Strip club

"Where are we? I think we are lost.."
"No the map says that if we continue past the ward office there will be a high school. Its just next to that."
"Continue past the local government office and the strip club is next to a high school? That is so Japan. Convenience and easy access."

Laughter erupts.

We were heading to a strip club that allowed foreigners to enter because one of our friends was on his way out of the country. The perfect way to say goodbye to a man is to take him to a place where women get undressed for money. No joke.

But as I stand there in the freezing cold night, I notice I am shivering much more than the others. Perhaps this cold and flu that I thought I was over was not quite done with me. I think a fever is starting to come out. The other guys are enjoying themselves wandering lost in the backstreets of a run down, has been, down town, beat up, 'hood' of sorts. Drinking beer cans in the backstreets and otherwise utterly ambivalent to the freezing cold wind that is cutting through my feeble and fluridden body, the guys speak loudly and laugh a lot.

I look at them in admiration knowing how much I would love to be getting tanked on my way in to my first ever visit to a Japanese strip club. What will happen behind those doors? I wonder.... I know that Japan gets freaky stylely when the doors are closed. Haha... hidden sleaze...

I look at my shaky hands
Pop another vicks menthol drop
breathe in and shudder from the cold
Feel my head pounding
struggle to walk straight
Cough, splutter, choke on my phlegm

I am snot.

Gross.

I notice the faded and blinking neons that say this is the place and as we open the decrepit doors a decrepit door man arrives to ask us whats going on.

"We wanna see naked chicks!" is the general unspoken consensus and after the rules are explained we head in for some 'sleazy-time'.

One long runway, a few patrons sitting singularly about the place. Silent, sleepy and keeping to themselves.

Us = loud, rowdy, excited and obnoxious.

The staff tell us to shut the fuck up........almost every 5 minutes, but its too late for those guys. They have already decided that they are bringing the party and making it happen.

NOW, here is when things get very Japanese.

The curtains open and a somewhat tall Japanese girl takes to the stage wearing..

A wedding dress???

OK...? She makes her way back and forth around the stage walking like bride on her way to the altar. Holding flowers. WTF? We are all doing WTF faces and commenting on the bizarre music that doesn't suit the situation, mood, or any of our expectations for a strip club. Apart from that, the only skin we can see is her face. This is taking too long, is weird, she ain't that cute anyway, and what the hell is she doing there now? Sitting on the stage? What is with the..... wait..... She's taking it off.... whoooaa....

HELL YEAH!!!!!!

We start giving her a round of applause because her body is off the hook!

The staff run over again an tell us to keep it down. Ha!

At the end of her dance we put some cash on the stage so she would come over to us to say hello and show us her pussy. I thought it was hilarious. Another Japanese guy looked like he had just seen the second coming of Christ and was in utter amazement. I kid you not, his expression was priceless and if I had it on camera I assure you it would be posted.

I watched some more girls but ended up leaving early cause I was too sick. But it was a fun time other than that.

Yay strippers!