Writing's On The Wall

I don't know how much time I have left with my GF.
Although it seems that we are doing perfect together, its limited. I'm sensing that her family is putting pressure on her about seeing me.

She had a breakdown and cried yesterday. She said that she is not ready to break up with me. It seemed a bit sudden, like, why are we talking about this topic? Then she referred to me having to leave the country one day and said that we will be breaking up eventually...

I wonder if she is mentally preparing herself to start shutting me out and is looking more closely for my faults to justify a breakup?

If it happens, and I'm not just being paranoid, this is going to hurt us both.

Homely sex

This chick on the left is a Japanese pornstar. She reminds me of a chick I used to hook up with. That chick was a slutty looking girl who was into being homely and having homely sex.

When I say homely, really I mean orderly. Like, first, there should be a shower had separately. Make up removed. Clothes had to be changed into sleeping clothes. After this, slow missionary silent sex. Then sleep. It's not my style.

Often I'm pretty communicative when I fuck. Like, I'm talking almost non-stop. Other times I don't speak at all. Most of the time, with most of the girls I date, as soon as we get inside we are ripping our clothes off and fucking. This is what we both want to do.

I met up with the massage therapist for old times sake the other day since she is leaving town soon. She looked hot, but I was soon reminded of things didn't work out between us. Amongst other things, it was her homely sex style. Being orderly with sex is fine, but sometimes you gotta break free, get erotic and enjoy the moment when it arises. Not; stop it, protest and say, "Later" or "After I take off my make up and have a shower". Why not before, during and after the shower? Nonetheless we got it on in the shower and she was screaming a lot and seemed to be having a sensory overload. Later she claimed she hadn't had sex since we last met. Possibly true, possibly bullshit. Whatever. Things have obviously changed between us and like many girls of her age she was quick to bring up the marriage topic. Not my scene baby.

This woman's body is almost the same as my GF's

Slim, sleek and long wavy hair. I like!

Question: How can I get in touch with you?? I'm Japanese and I'd love to go on a pick-up session with you!!!

If you live in Kansai I'd be cool to meet and go pick up chicks in Osaka. We will hit on chicks and have a ton of fun. Just post on my formspring with your email address. If you live outside of Kansai, I won't be able to do it. I just got back from a very intense pick-up session that lasted 5 days and nights in Tokyo. I won't be going back anytime soon, although there are a few cute girls there who I met that could make me change my mind....
I might write about that next time.

Question: what are some cool places to check out? eg, shopping, sight seeing, ect

This question came in a while ago but I haven't got around to answering it until now.

In Kansai, I like shopping in Namba, Shinsaibashi centergai and America Mura in Shinsaibashi and Sannomiya in Kobe. There is one Kansai shop called 'cook jeans' whose clothes I really love but I just hate their craftsmanship. Every piece of clothing I get from them has had a problem with the stitching so threads unthread and buttons fall off really quickly. They describe their clothes as 'Tough, wild and cool'. I think it suits me well.

In Kanto, I like Shibuya. I was in 109 mens the other day and I got some boots. A lot of their stuff is geared towards host kei and gyaru-o so I'm not really into a lot of it anymore, getting a little more mature with my clothing style, but there were a few shops that I would drop more cash in. Harajuku used to be cool a few years ago, but not anymore for the same reasons.

Other shops I like; Zara is pretty cool at times. Uniqlo is cheap and has simple T's that are nothing too fancy but be sure to walk down the street and see someone else wearing the same thing. JEANSMATE! Open 24 hours MOFO! Get it at 3pm or 3am- good for simple tops. Try to check out the underground shopping in all major shopping areas too. There are often clearance places that have a variety of goods at good prices. I also prefer to get shoes from clothing shops rather than shoe shops, however it depends on the item; I got some boots from ABC mart a month or two ago. Usually I hate ABC mart. For suits and work stuff I like 'comme ca store' or 'perfect suits factory'. If I'm stretched for cash I go to 'Aoyama'. A lot of young guys might think spending money on something you will wear to work is a waste, I say; 'never underestimate the appeal of a man in a well fitting suit knocking off work and loosening his tie over a cold drink.'
In other words, you don't only work in work clothes.

As for sightseeing; I like all sightseeing. I'll go anywhere and everywhere, but nothing stands out above what any other travel guide could detail more clearly.

Freak out

I got back from Tokyo last night and met my GF. She was more eager to see me than ever before (why? I was only gone 6 days). We spent a great time having sex, then she went home. Today we had plans to meet and do sale shopping at 12pm. I got a really cute message from her around 11.30am with a lot of cute decomail icons on it. But there was some other dude's name on it. A guy called Kai. WHO THE FUCK IS KAI?!

This is where not being me becomes hard to understand, but being me is very easy to understand. I think I lose readers in the process.

I just looked at the mail. Not angry, but surprised. We have a rule; one night stands are OK, but anything else is a 'no no'. Seeing her put all this effort into a mail to appeal to some other dude made me really disappointed. I don't care about the other dude, I care about her putting in all that effort to look cute to another dude when she doesn't usually do it for me. Ideally, she should reluctantly hook up with another dude, then think, "Shit this guy doesn't match me as well as my BF." Not be spending her free time try to line up some guy!

I got up and just left my house and went walking in no particular direction, listening to some Indian mandala chanting music on my ipod. I started thinking about the future and how things will be different not having a GF. Being free and available to do whatever, anytime. Not having to write phone messages all the time would be nice. But not having someone to talk to and feel comfortable with, someone who understands me well and accepts my quirky nature could be hard to deal.

My head was spiraling for about 3 hours while my GF was calling me non-stop, with me ignoring all calls. Eventually I sent a message telling her that she fucked up with the mail, and I wasn't Kai. She replied that she was at my apartment banging on the door, and if I didn't open the door or pick up the phone, she was gonna go home. I told her I wasn't home anyway and she should fuck off already. She couldn't get it. Then she sent another message saying that the deco mail character she put in the original mail was カイ君 (Kai) from the softbank commercials. That's why she wrote his name in there. She was just trying to be sweet and cute.

I fucked up so hard. On many levels. Seriously. I met her and she was nearly in tears, really angry and just started hitting me, but I held her tight until we both calmed down, in the middle of a busy street while a small crowd gathered.....

We are all good now.