Controlling your orgasm (premature ejaculation)

This is an article I wrote for a mens forum. I know some women read my blog but I think this is one topic that is best left to the men. I recommend women best to skip over this post. Cheers!

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Some guys have an issue with cumming too soon during sex. More often than not, their partner realizes this more than they themselves do. Ignorance is the biggest factor in the issue. I will explain how I have come to understand it more.

First lets try a quick interactive experiment.

In a moment I'm going to tell you to turn your head to the left. You will feel strain and reach your natural limit of rotation and notice a point on the wall. See and remember that point then come back to the screen to keep reading. Try it now. Go.

Now I will give you a new instruction. First you will feel yourself where you are sitting, if you aren't already, pull up your spine and relax into a good posture. Get comfortable and take a breath in and out. Relax. In a moment you will turn your head to the left again. This time you will go much further than last time. Further than your natural limit. You will see the point on the wall from last time and you will extend beyond it. You might be surprised about how much further you can go, but you will stay relaxed and find a new point on the wall. Try it now. Go.

How did you go?

If you did it the way I did it, you might have noticed a big difference.

This is just a demonstration of what your body is capable of achieving when giving it clear instructions on how to perform.

When I realized this, I considered how it might relate to sex (as I often relate pretty much everything to sex) and how I could use it in a good way to make myself and the women who sleep with me enjoy sex more. What I found was two very simple myths;

1. Men cum too quickly during sex.
2. It takes a long time for women to cum, if they cum at all. Many women don't cum regularly during sex.

You can quickly disregard these two ideas as bullshit because they are made by loser dudes who can't control their orgasm and chicks who are laying loser dudes who can't make them cum. You are not a loser dude. You can, will and in every way are able to do what you want in the bed- if you give your body the correct instructions!

Take young Tom for example. He has a hot date with Yuka, she is totally his type. They are actually going to round 3rd base this time and he is sliding for home. Protection is on, they are excited things are moving in a back and forth direction. But alas, young Tom might has concerns that he may cum too soon and not impress. Let's listen to the internal instructions he is giving himself. "OMG shit! This is actually happening! This is great. She is so hot! OMG. I'm gonna cum!" and in that last line lies the prophecy of truth.

All the while Yuka is saying to herself, "Really? He looks like he is gonna cum. I'm not even close yet." Another idea that becomes fact.

In actuality, all they are doing is giving themselves and their bodies commands; "I'm gonna cum (too soon)" and "I'm not even close." By all means, if their brain and body is functioning normally, these commands will be performed. You know this because your neck almost spun a 180 degree spin a few moments ago simply because I told you to! Don't psych yourself into premature ejaculation and understand and respect the body-mind connection!

Here are some commands that I can lend to you for the next time you are in bed that are much more beneficial for you and your partner to enjoy sex more.
"I'm gonna enjoy this but not until she enjoys it first."
"I'm gonna make her cum. Then I'm gonna cum too."
"I'm gonna slay this hot bitch until she screams for mercy."
ad infinitum.

Give the commands you want to perform to your body and your body will perform them.

It really is that simple.

Perhaps you are out of touch with your body and the commands you give it don't seem to be working. Fear not. Walk in baby steps. Get some control, then gain more. After you gain more, gain even more than that. Eventually you will have full control.

Another point is to know your own arousal level. But know it in detail. On a scale of 1-10 with ten being the absolute peak (ejaculation) and 9.9 being the point of no return- then KNOW in intimate detail the difference between 6- a semi hard on, 7-hard on, all the way up to 9.1 and 9.2. What are the differences between them? What about 9.3? If you can differentiate between these levels, you can still really enjoy a high level of sexual pleasure without ejaculation. Then you can take rests and move up and down the scale.

One final tip I read in a Chinese Taoist sex manual was that when the sexual energy 'Qi' is leaving the body in the form of ejaculation, it is possible to hold it in with two methods;
1. Brace the pubococcygeus (PC) muscle hard. It feels like you are finishing taking a leak.
2. Pull out your penis and place a finger on the head of the penis.
Whether you buy into Eastern Taoist beliefs or not, they both seem to work for me, but really should become redundant if you simply know your arousal level and consciously control it by giving solid commands.

Enjoy sex more.