Woke up in the early hours of the morning with the sudden feeling that someone was going to attack me. Got out of bed and really suddenly locked the front door and and windows. I have never done this before ever. I usually sleep solid as a rock. Went back to bed and saw my phone flashing. There was a somewhat angry message sent to me by the bi-hostess sent maybe 10 minutes earlier.
Went to work and Captain douchebag anti-sex wants to kill me still. He's not a happy guy right now, at least not with me.
Finished work and was walking through town on my way home and I saw my ex-GF yakuza girl on the street with her friends. The girl who I have been thinking about almost every day for the last 3 years.
This was the first time I have seen her since we broke up all that time ago in the cafe. The time where she said that she can't marry a foreign guy and her dad wants her to get married now so she has to break up and look for a husband. That sucked. Really bad.
Tonight I saw her and just stopped walking and looked at her like it was a ghost. I was in disbelief. I didn't expect to see her again, ever. She saw me and freaked out and stepped back away from my direction quickly. I saw her eyes start to go red and fill with tears and I felt the blood in my head drain and I couldn't really think or react. She waved at me and mustered up a smile. I waved back, just barely, and hesitated on whether to approach and talk or...what? Her friends started picking up on what was going on and began to look around at me. She walked on.
I turned away and felt my face flush with heat while a strange burning feeling crept into my eyes. I didn't look back. I felt dizzy. Thought I was going to fall over or something.
How much I just wanted to walk up to her and just....
Say how I feel...
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