Are you a naturally social person?

Hypothetical Situation;

Lets take the coolest guy in town 'Chad', the champion of his high school sports team, the guy who banged the hot chicks and went to every party and was admired by all, the same guy who could walk into a room and speak to anyone about anything and have a great time, the really naturally social guy- let's take him and put him in a dark room of solitary confinement with only a computer to play some role playing game. Let's leave him there for the rest of his college years. There he will sit and fester day in day out with no one to talk to. No social interactions. Then, let's suddenly take him out and throw him into a party with people he doesn't know. How will he react? How naturally sociable will he be?

Let's take his unsociable geek little brother 'Charlie' and lock him out of his room. Lock him away from his computer and his shell of comfort and security. Let's take him everyday to a bar or a party where he has to interact and be sociable with people. Let's get him a job where he has to talk to people, day in day out. Then after his older brother has come out of solitary confinement let's reunite them at the same big party.

Who will appear more socially savvy? Who will know what topics are hot to talk about? Who will seem calm and at ease amongst the crowd of people and who will be tense and uncomfortable?
Who appears to be the naturally socially savvy guy that draws the attention of women?

Let's take a look at 2 girls now.

'Hilary'; she got a lot of attention when she was young and into her teenage years she started developing her feminine qualities a little sooner than the other girls. Her breasts were a little bigger and she got more attention, especially from the older guys. With this increase in attention she had to know how to react and 'naturally' learned to develop ways of interacting with guys. As she got invited to do more stuff with the older guys whom she thought were cute, she wanted to impress so she started to do research on makeup in magazines. She started wearing more provocative clothing cause it helped put the attention on her. The attention she received from guys helped validate her self esteem. She spent a lot of time around guys and was comfortable talking to them and found them most interesting when they were good looking and fashionable.

'Sarah'; is 'Hilary's little sister. She found herself out of the limelight when her sister was around. She never got much attention for her appearance, but her grades at school were good. She got a lot of encouragement from her teachers to do well. Her parents even called her "the brains of the family." She really wanted to continue to receive validation, uphold her image and not let everyone down so she spent more time studying than concerning herself with diet, fashion, make up and boys.

These two sisters went to the same party with 'Chad' and 'Charlie'. Physically, the two brothers resemble each other. The main difference in their aesthetic is that the older brother 'Chad', wears clothes that were cool 4 years ago before he shut himself off and lived the life of a geek. He has pale skin, unkempt hair, acts fidgety and appears somewhat creepy. Younger brother 'Charlie' is chilled out, has fashionable clothing, a haircut that suits him, dances like no one is watching and is enjoying himself amongst the crowd of strangers.

The two girls also resemble each other also. They have both finished high school and are both adults with fully developed female bodies. The difference in their aesthetic is that while 'Hilary's manufactured look has a cute skirt, long styled hair and make up that accentuates her natural beauty, her sister 'Sarah' has unfashionable "comfortable" clothing. She wears glasses to help her see clearly because she is not bothered with contacts. She also is a little heavier than big sister because she doesn't pay as much attention to what she eats and long study sessions make her hungry so she binges a little.

Who is going to be drawn to who? Who is going to naturally click with who? My money is on 'Charlie' hooking up with 'Hilary'. Although 'Hilary' is more superficial and fake and spent a ton of time and money being a total boy crazy geek trying to impress guys, she is hotter and easier to talk to. 'Charlie' is now fashionable, cool, less awkward and can roll with having a conversation. 'Chad' the high school football star has lost his appeal cause he ain't playing football anymore and is just creepy while the geek girl 'Sarah' isn't appealing to anyone because she is too uptight and simply not attractive. They hook up with no one.

In Japan, I notice most people are really shy, socially awkward, and in a lot of ways, pretty creepy. Of course this is interesting in itself, and is one of the reasons I enjoy living here. What I am saying is that behavior, social or antisocial, is a result of the circumstances in which you are exposed. Japanese people often lose exposure to large social settings when they join the company. While the college kids are cool, hanging out in groups and doing club activities, unless they get a job in sales or mizushoubai, I expect them to loose their savvy.

In the beginning of my story, 'Chad' was naturally drawn to being social because for him it was fun whereas for his geek little brother it wasn't good because people didn't notice him. It's more fun to be at home. Same deal for the girls. 'Hilary' likes to go out and be social cause it gives her more validation while her sister can get more validation from being scholarly. If you change their circumstances, their behavior becomes altered, naturally(?). Like the winners of national talent contests that used to be humble and charmingly awkward who become phony once they hit the limelight, Sarah and Charlie too could become hot and sociable should their circumstances change.

What kind of person are you? What circumstances have you been placed in? Did you choose your circumstances? Do you want to change them? Can they change?